I did it! I organized Dear Diary, and have it compiled as a book, available on Kindle.  Check it out: http://www.amazon.com/Dear-Diary-Confessions-Shovel-Man/dp/B001OQCKZM/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1232255454&sr=8-1

Dear Diary,

BOREDOM, BOREDOM, BOREDOM, BOREDOM, BOREDOM!!  My boredom for a horse!! (To quote Catherine the Great.)  I’m so bored I have nothing to do but write “boredom” over and over again. (I can see why President Stalwart was always declaring war on people.)

Dear Diary,

Well, I phoned my real folks and explained to them why I didn’t call on Christmas, what with inviting the wrong people and stuff. I was kind of worried that they might be hurt, but Mom said there’s been a major snowstorm going on for about two weeks and that they haven’t gotten a paper ever since the paper boy got eaten by a polar bear, so they weren’t really sure of what day it was and just missed it. But we made plans to have a really good Christmas next year. And Mom said she mailed me my present and that it should arrive sometime next week. She wouldn’t tell me what it is, but suggested that I buy some Puppy Chow just in case it’s hungry when it gets here.